luvrhino (luvrhino) wrote,
luvrhino
luvrhino

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If i pad this out to 150 pages, i wonder if i could get a book deal

I have unintentionally developed a new, effective diet method:

  1. Get food poisoning.

  2. Expel human waste from body, with great vigor, for a 24-hour period. To be a success, this should be done with enough violence that one should have slightly strained their diaphragm or other abdominal muscles.

  3. Try to keep self from dehydrating, but be incapable of retaining nearly as much fluid as expelled.

  4. For the following days, cease being hungry because of strained tummy muscles. Consuming a half-sized meal should make one feel a bit queasy and as though he overate.

I think the above describes my past five days. The first day, i believe i lost four pounds in fluid alone, though i assume i've gained that back now that i'm hydrated. The strained belly is a little strange. I don't notice it much, except that my appetite is almost completely suppressed.
Any kind of physical exertion (running up the stairs) makes me a bit winded.

I guess i should just take this opportunity to lose some of the weight that i gained after my knee surgery. As always, please consult a doctor before initiating any diet regimen.
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