Aside from my eyes, i'm also quite sore and in need of a cute female to give me a massage. My shoulders feel like drunk, myopic gorillas ripped my arms out and tried popping them back in. Despite being on disability, i am able to still do various sports. I've managed not to hurt myself too much while playing softball...just a couple bruised knuckles because my glove doesn't have enough padding. My knees have nice burns on them from me recklessly throwing my body around willy-nilly while playing beach volleyball. That's also where i screwed up my shoulders. On a positive side, i'm a helluva lot better at volleyball now than i was the night before going to the ER for my broken brain.
My last physical malady is all Emma's fault. She's on the varsity tennis team for her school and was bragging about getting a Varsity Letter and how she won her first game. Not wanting her to get a swollen head or any self-confidence, i taunted her, "You know, even though i've never played tennis in my life, i could still kick your ass."
Unfortunately, she took me up on my challenge and forced me to play her. The problem was that i was wearing running shoes and had absolutely no idea what i was doing. I ended up choking up on the racket and using it more like a ping pong paddle. The end result was that my feet and elbow hurt the next day.
Of course, i did kick her ass in the match (2-6. 6-4, 6-1).
