I'm not kidding.
Sometime after had that season had ended, i heard from multiple people with good taste that ANTM was remarkably good. I remained skeptical, since i didn't (and still don't) give a shit about modeling or fashion or most reality shows. Then, Television Without Pity's Djb, one of my favorites, started recapping the show starting in the second season, so i figured i'd give it a shot. After watching a couple episodes of said season, i went "meh" and gave up on watching the show, although i continued to read the lovely recaps. The people who had initially recommended ANTM now had mixed reviews, but were nearly universal in saying that the current show couldn't hold a candle to the first season.
While perusing my Tivo last week, i saw that VH1 was doing a ANTM first season marathon, so i recorded it. Furthermore, Djb had since gone back and recapped this season, so, even if the show was mediocre, i could at least see who he was snarking about when i read said recaps.
Well, i thoroughly enjoyed the show. The main difference between this and other seasons was in the casting, thanks mostly to one Miss Elyse Sewell, one of the most entertaining reality show contestants i have seen. Imagine an intelligent, pretentious, outspoken, bitchy, and, most importantly, funny 20-year-old pre-med college graduate being placed in an apartment with 9 other aspiring models, most of whom are just as stupid and catty as you'd imagine. It's a situation ripe for comedy and Elyse, for the most part, delivers. Allow Djb to describe Elyse at her ranting best during the second episode:
Not that her meltdown isn't absolutely fucking genius: "Adrianne, stop interrupting me. Stop quoting Jay and Silent Bob right in my ear. Robin, how [bleeped word, probably "god-love"]-ing dare you show me the 'foolish is the atheist' Bible verse this morning." But this is the best: "Giselle, you [bleep]-ing, worthless [bleep]. You are so wasteful, bitchy, stupid...you're worthless. Your parents must be ashamed of you." Brilliant! And I love "wasteful," like she totally hates Giselle because she doesn't recycle her plastics or something. More. I demand MORE! People...there IS MORE. "J..." Well, wasn't expecting this, but hey, as long as she's snarking on the girls in her life: "You offended me today." And then so many words are bleeped that I have no idea what she says about him. But if I had to guess, it really does sound like she called him a "shit slice."...She ends on a highLater, she was on Jimmy Kimmel and this exchange occurred:
note: "Dammit. Let me [bleep]-ing die. You bitches." Cancel television forever. Its high-water mark has officially been reached.
JK: We were very entertained by the clip of you lashing out at others on the show.Me likey. Not sure i'd care much for her in real life, but on my telly she's wonderful. On cursory examination, her Livejournal, elysesewell, appears interesting, as well. I'm curious about maddening's opinion of her photography skills.
Elyse: Otherwise known as the high point of my life.
JK: Really? Is that right?
E: [deadpan] I masturbate to that.
Anyway, i recommend you watch the first two episodes, especially the second. If it doesn't do anything for you, well, at least i'm trying to keep you entertained.